RE: unconscious joy

oh yehudah, my friend, my jewish friend

i have been praying so much lately.
both from the sidur [prayerbook] and without.
also much meditation and yoga.

many cultures are influencing me ...
in truth, friends are really the great ones.
we are open to each other, very vulnerable.

i want to share with you...
that i love praying with a wonderous awesome desire
that the words be according to the greatest knowing
the purest intent - i ask that each word come that way.

since i don't want that knowing or purity to be limited
to my own bounded little self, i ask great souls for help.
indeed i ask to be made from scratch in that very moment.

what i experience is a great perplexity in revelation...
for me that knowing and purity is unique to my reality
and i accept this humbly but still would love to share it.

i don't really know if my perception is real beyond me or not.
all i wish is that it be infact real for everyone - i just praise it so.

i believe we access the unconscious when we pray.
i sense myself being broken & remade from the inside...

i don't really know that wonderful inner or outer world ...
yet the words seem to join them in some tangible reality.

it seems to me that my unconscious is touching ... souls.
and every word is a joyous prayerful remaking of a world.

perhaps if i can improve my life this way, even just a little...
perhaps this single word will make a difference in my life.
perhaps the words & feelings will manifest outside of my prayer.

i am starting to see how precious & powerful ....
i am starting to appreciate more....
i am learning to live again.

oh wonderful dream ...

love and compassion



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